As much as things change…

So I looked around and the next thing you know I haven’t written a post in a month and a half. And I mean I haven’t written period not here or on livejournal. I haven’t even logged in on livejournal. The main reason is an easy one, one I am reluctant to admit to because I have a certain level of annoyance at other bloggers who write this but…I have been extremely busy. Between the job move where I hear at least 50 times a day “just ask Cat” or “you need to check with Cat she takes care of that”; school egads why in the world did I decide to take a freaking math class during my lunch break????; V being in a sling; and Corey being “challenging” for lack of  a better word; I have not had time to blog. I have not had time to watch tv and if it weren’t for facebook I probably would have fallen off the face of the earth. So the details.

1st off I may have tested out of math back in 1988 and maybe it will be a very cool thing to just pick up where I left off in my core paralegal classes. But taking my lone math class when I have not taken a math class since 1987 means I have been struggling. Simply put if I had not taken this class and went with a core class at night instead I would have been forced to drop after V’s injury. And this bit of information is the only silver lining in what can only be described as  x = (hell+pain)-y(happiness) for me.

Corey-well we had his annual meeting and since I am still waiting for the hearing date for guardianship Corey had to attend the meeting and write his name beside mine. All 65 pages spelling out C-O-R-E-Y each time. This was the only comic relief in what was a blow and I mean a physical blow. To add goals we had taken off 2 years ago, 5 years ago, or 7 years ago. The feeling of walking in a circle, the feeling of no amount of effort will change a reality after 17 years I still can’t accept. It’s like a punch to the stomach.  But on the brighter side I did take him to see Disney on Ice for his 19th birthday Thursday night. Yes 19 sighs. And we had a wonderful time at the Walk for Autism on Saturday. It was probably the one calm spot in what can only be described as a very challenging weekend. I wound up on the floor in a physical wrestling match with Corey yesterday to really bring me back to past issues I thought we had long since overcome. He pushed his teacher on Thursday (yes the same day as Disney on Ice it’s bitter and sweet in my world) she hit her head on the wall and wound up with an emergency visit and a mild concussion. And that is my life with Corey everything is fine until it’s not.

So what else my mom is still a royal pain in the ass and has taken that show on the road to facebook to be more of a royal pain in the ass. A great example being her insistence on making a thing of me not having a party at the bowling alley or some other gathering the way I did for Cameron last month. Forget that Corey has been a challenge, forget that I was on pins and needles praying his teacher didn’t press assault charges, yes forget all that because mom has discovered something I appear reluctant to do that she can then bug me to death about. This all ended with her showing up at my house yesterday unannounced with food so we “do something for Corey’s bday” because I assume the cake I baked, the evening watching Disney on Ice, and then our participating in the Walk for Autism weren’t enough “things”. And ok mom shows up with food no biggie except I had to hear about the Holly Peete interview and maybe if I had intervened earlier, maybe if I had more money Corey would be further along. Of course this was intermingled with every other useless suggestion she made as Corey did his thing as I warned her he was in that mood hence the reason I didn’t organize a party. And then when I was at my boiling point I had to endure the “you are just like your grandmother” charges of not being capable of accepting help. Which of course is what her useless digs were “help”…moving on.

MNG hmmm well he’s the master of facebook these days having found a nice group of old friends from N. Dakota to show how much better off he is not working. Documenting every new project with plenty of photos and there is always a new project. He checks in with me every once in awhile to give me project stats he knows I am already aware of thanks to facebook. Or to give me weight updates on how much he has lost thanks to all the hard work he is putting in on his house. I think #1 he has found someone new to shake his feathers at and #2 I have been too busy to be much fun in the preening for attention category.

D yes D he will contact me every blue moon. I think it’s his own pavlov’s dogs research. “If I text her will she still drool?” “If I send an email with yet another new email address will she jump at the chance to reconnect with me?” “If I make mention of the hotel will she cream her pants in anticipation?” All very good questions, no?